Sunday, March 3, 2013


i know it sounds like bullshit, but i have a great great aunt who survived the titanic.

her name appears among the list of survivors, in record books around the world.

the interesting thing to me is not that she survived, (though i'm glad that she did), it's more that she knew the ill fated ship would not make the crossing.

she knew it as soon as she boarded the ship, when the rosary she'd been carrying slipped through her graceful irish fingers into the frigid water below.

she took this for the ominous sign that it was, an indicator of fate.

family legend has it that she drove her shipmates mad w/her pacing in the cabin.  she simply couldn't put the idea of doom out of her head.

and yet, when the ship finally hit the iceberg, and the alarms sounded, and the rising panic set it, she was actually fairly cool about it.

stewards galore ran through the hallways, calling out to passengers to prepare to disembark.

women and children first.

i'm not saying my great great aunt was blase about it, but it sounds like she might have been close.

her dread had already happened.

she somehow already knew.

don't ask me how or why.

she just sensed it.

that's obvious.

anyone can do this.  

even you.  

when the calls rang out, she said okay.  let me go get my shawl.

and she did.

and she survived.

her pocket watch turns up at auction on occasion, fetching ever higher bids. the last one i'm aware of was at sotheby's in new york.  some hot shot anonymous bidder now owns this piece of history.

it's significance re value, is the hour the clock stopped, documenting the time of doom, when water damage from the transition from sinking ship to lifeboat occurred.

i think of her.

i was pacing like that with regularity this fall regarding pursuit of cancer diagnosis.

i knew something was up.

even if the godfather and the initial doctor did not.

so when the final diagnosis was finally handed down, when those calls rang out,  it was the same i think, as it had been for her.  

i somehow already knew.

and so do you.

the rest was confirmation.

minus the shawl.

and the band played on.

xx katy

1 comment:

  1. Very interesting. I'm a big believer in animal intuition. Walk softly but carry a big stick.
    Living in fear isn't good -- but being mindful & aware is. Circumstances, or really, people, that make us doubt or mistrust our own intuition, here's to the health of their enemies' enemies.



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